Let's stop bullying in McHenry County schools

Bullying in schools isn't going to stop because I say so. Or because other adults say so. Or because teachers, administrators and staff say so.

Bullying will stop when the students say so. And to whom might students listen?

Jessica Brookshire is the founder of the K.A.R.M.A. Foundation. This is Kids Against Ridicule, Meanness and Aggression. Who is Jessica?

A victim of bullying. And,

M.A. '11, Auburn University (Hispanic Studies)
B.A., '09, Auburn University, with honors (International Trade and Spanish; minor in Political Science)
Competed in Miss Alabama pageants in 2009, 2010 and 2011
Headed for law school after another year running the K.A.R.M.A. Foundation.
She has addressed over 85,000 students in two years.

Read her whole bio on http://www.thekarma.org/ And be sure to look at the photos on the website. You can almost feel her energy and joy in the work she does!

What would it take to bring her to McHenry County (Ill.) schools, where thousands of students could benefit from her message? Print this article and take it to your school's principal and PTO leaders. Ask them to do whatever it takes to work with other schools' administrators and District leaders to bring Jessica to McHenry County.

Anti-Bullying meeting postponed to May 21

The May meeting of the Principled Minds' Anti-Bullying Network has been moved to Saturday, May 21st, 9:15 AM at the Woodstock Public Library.

At that meeting the group will discuss experiences with bullying and some suggestions for how to handle bullying, and the group will also talk about future plans for the Network.

Mary Fox, Harold Rail, and Dan Larsen will all be there for Principled Minds, along with community members, parents and students who are interested in this topic. Please place this meeting on your calendar now and remember to show up.

Parent advice wrong on bullying

Read this article in the Daily Herald about bullying. Jodee Blanco has some excellent advice for parents, teachers and school administrators. http://www.dailyherald.com/article/20110210/news/702119942/

Most of us would immediately agree that telling our kids to "suck it up" doesn't work.

I remember advice I gave to my nephew in Atlanta in about 1976; I wonder if he does. He had come home from school, crying about some kid who had threatened him or hit him. He and I went out in the backyard and had a little chat, away from the ears of my sister and her husband. I told him to lay into that kid, the next time it happened. "Get your best licks in fast," I told him. I added that he might get pounded, but it probably wouldn't happen again.

Guess I'll have to call him and ask him whatever happened.

Of course, my advice of that day wouldn't work today. If you look cross-eyed at someone now, next thing you know, the school resource officer ("cop") will have you on the floor and cuffs on you.

Sounds like we ought to get Jodee to come to Woodstock and educate students and parents here. Stop pussy-footing around with politically-correct language. Let's get down to the nitty-gritty and call bullying to a screeching halt.

And be sure to visit her website at www.jodeeblanco.com

Combatting the bully

On December 18 I wrote an article on www.specialkids-specialparents.info/ about Jessica Brookshire, founder of K.A.R.M.A., which stands for Kids Against Ridicule, Meanness and Aggression. While traveling in the South, I had heard Jessica on a radio program, and she is one young woman you do not want to pick a fight with, especially if you are bully.

Her organization is a crusade to end bullying in school-age children across the nation. The grassroots effort started in Alabama schools, and there is interest already in 43 states and 14 foreign countries.

Jessica is a 2009 honors graduate of Auburn University and is working on her Masters. In June she will compete in the Miss Alabama contest, and she may be headed for law school before it's all over.

K.A.R.M.A. will sponsor two large townhall meetings this month. On January 23 as many as 3,000 interested parents, students, educators and community members may attend in Montgomery, Ala., and on January 24 a townhall meeting will be held in Birmingham, Ala.

Wouldn't it be great if the schools in McHenry County (Ill.) came together for a large event and invited Jessica and K.A.R.M.A. to Woodstock, Crystal Lake and/or McHenry?

Getting bullying stopped in the schools is the major step to stopping it elsewhere. When students learn that bullying can be permanently damaging, even fatal, and it is no longer acceptable or to be tolerated, then it eventually will be extinguished in the community and in the workplace.

The website for K.A.R.M.A. is www.thekarma.org/ Information is not yet on that site about the Montgomery and Birmingham townhall meetings. If you will be in the area, contact them through the webform. Or let me know, and I'll help you get information.

Three cheers to Jessica Brookshire. Thank you, Jessica, for all you are doing!

County-wide bullying hotline?

Be sure to read Mary Fox's Letter to the Editor in today's Northwest Herald. She writes about bullying, mean-spiritedness and violence.

What McHenry County needs is a county-wide hotline for reports of bullying.

It wouldn't have to be a manned hotline, although messages should be collected at least daily. Bullying is usually an ongoing problem that doesn't require emergency action. It's certainly important, but often not urgent. Any urgent or emergency need should be reported to police and the school district office, then reported to the hotline.

Non-emergency reports could be made to the hotline, where volunteers could work with the bullied student and parents to guide them through the reporting process and to help them get corrective action.

A hotline would reduce the possibility that school personnel would attempt to diminish the importance of reported bullying. A hotline would also help identify schools with problems that are not being addressed. School personnel are not likely to tell a student or parent that others are also reporting bullying.

Students and parents: what do you think? Is it time for a bullying hotline in McHenry County?

Confront school bullies

Today's Northwest Herald (Sunday, November 1; page 1D) carries an excellent article by Jami Kunzer about bullying in schools. What school district is involved? Woodstock District 200!

I heard Kelly Kucharski speak at the recent MCC event put together by Principled Minds, a new not-for-profit organization established by Harold Rail of Afterglow Creative Services, here in Woodstock.

It's too bad that you'll have to buy today's Northwest Herald to read this article. Apparently, it's not online, where it could be read and forwarded widely within District 200. A search on www.nwherald.com for "Kucharski" or "bullies" or "principled" does not find the article. I was told last week that NWH is having trouble with its search engine. It shouldn't be that hard to fix!

I have known of bullying in Woodstock District 200 schools since about 1998 and have fought many battles with them. Putting an end to bullying in District 200 is like trying to win the war in Afghanistan. Just when you think you winning, another "explosion" occurs and you find out you are losing.

And I can tell you from first-hand experience that it is not just the students who bully other students.

An Illinois State Board of Education (ISBE) technical consultant was called in late one school year. Although she visited a student's classrooms on only one day and for only four hours, she reported that she had observed a teacher and staff "interacting inappropriately with the student, causing an escalation in undesirable behavior." Oh, you mean "bullying"...

When your kid comes home and reports problems at school, believe your kid first. When the school folks tell you that could never happen in their school, do not automatically believe them and distrust your own kid.

Parents must get involved and stay involved. We must stop all bullying in our schools!

Bullying Seminar held at MCC

There was a good program about bullying in schools tonight at MCC.

Principled Minds, of Woodstock, Ill., assembled a panel of five. Harold Rail, executive director, said he had notified all school districts in McHenry County.

How many of them bothered to pass the information along to parents? Not too many, I'd guess, since the audience numbered less than a dozen!

See the full article on http://www.specialkids-specialparents.info/

Bullying - In Schools & Elsewhere

Bullying – In Schools & Elsewhere

Is your child a victim of bullying in school? Going to and from school? On the schoolbus?

The last two issues of a valuable online newsletter from WrightsLaw.com contain valuable information and tips for recognizing and combating bullying.

Go to http://www.wrightslaw.com/ and check it out. The series is in two parts. The first part was for the week of Octoboer 21-27; the second is this week.

If you have a child in Special Education, subscribe to the free weekly e-newsletters right on that website. If you know a parent of a child in Special Education, forward the e-newsletter to him or her. Getting this information out to parents is critical.

Illinois schools are supposed to be safe for all students. The laws are in place. All that is needed is the will to make them so and keep them that way. When students are allowed to name-call, push, shove, spit, topple books from arms, and be grossly disrespectful, those actions must be challenged and corrected.

Bullying should be reported to the principal and to the teachers. If corrective action is not immediately taken, then contact the Superintendent of the School District; if that doesn’t fix it, go to the School Board, the Regional Office of Education and the State Board of Education (ISBE). Document everything. Do not rely only on telephone calls. Confirm telephone reports and calls in writing and save them.

Do you know that bullying is not limited to actions by students? I heard a Technical Consultant from ISBE make a report at a school meeting in which she described actions by school staff as “inappropriate interactions with the student that actually resulted in an increase in undesirable behavior.” She could have used one word to describe it: “bullying”.

Do teachers bully students? What do you think? Were you ever bullied by a teacher?

Questions about bullying? Can’t get it stopped? Post your comments here. If you are concerned about retaliation, email them to me or call me.