Handling Adversity

How do we teach kids to deal with adversity? Or do we?

Yesterday a friend shared a story with me about a basketball player whose mother died just before a big game. Without asking, the coach took the kid off the roster, and the team headed off to the game. The kid drove two hours to catch up with his team and told the coach he wanted to play.

The game referee refused, because the kid was not on the roster that had been submitted. The other team did not object to his playing. The referee finally relented but would not budge from the rule that there would be a two-shot penalty against the kid’s team.

How did the other team handle it? When the other team’s player was ready to shoot, he missed both baskets – intentionally.

Now that’s sportsmanship.

Adversity is something that comes into each person’s life at different times and in different ways. When it does, do we encourage our kids to meet it head-on, to express their feelings, to consider their choices, and let them make the choices that are best for themselves? To take the high road?

Or do we encourage them to “take it easy”, telling them that they need a few days off to “deal with it.” Yes, if they truly need a few days, then fine. But, if they don’t, why jam it down their throats?

Perhaps this boy knew that the best thing for him was to play, for himself and for his team.

Shouldn’t we be encouraging and training our kids to accept the speed bumps in life and keep moving?